Only one fan awaits them in the locker room.


1. Sam Presti, Oklahoma Thunder: Executive of Year
Who would have ever thunk Presti could make us forget the Sonics in such a short time. Seattle grungers must be seething, one more reason to gaze at their shoes.
2. Brook Lopez and Chris Douglas-Roberts: Dynamic Underground Duo of Year
Sure, they’re practically six feet under ground, but they’re still scoring! This is a future “silver lining” for Jersey (IF there is such a thing). BTW, what is Lawrence Frank still doing at the board? Chemistry class was canceled, dude!
3. Paul Westphal, Sacramento Kings: Extreme NBA Makeover Award
If Arnold could have worked this quickly in the capital of Colliefornia? (Well, he might be able to pronounce “Colliefornia” by now.)
4. Houston Rockets: Scrappiest Bunch in the League
Yao and McGrady’s injuries a blessing in disguise for the future of the franchise? What happens with T-Mac in the mix? Does Scrappy Doo Aaron Brooks still have the “Lemme at ‘em! I’ll splat ‘em!” attitude? Or will he have to take a back seat to Scoob Mac?
5. Ron Artest, Los Angeles Lakers: The Quiet Man
Role player extraordinaire, quietly going about his business, a true professional work ethic in action. Can it last? As long as the Lakers are successful it can. And you just know Ron-Ron is going to be making an appearance on next year’s Entourage, especially if the Lakers win the championship. Victory!


New Yorkers need someone to dump their scorn on. (God knows they don’t want to ruffle Big Baby D’Antoni’s feathers.) “Let’s get A.I.!” Perfect distraction. Perfect scapegoat.